The Amazing Silent Alarmclock!

Ladies and Gentlemen!
Do you have a roomie that happens to be especially sensitive to noise? Maybe it has come to the point where the knife-conversation is inevitable!

Maybe you want to get up before your spouse in order to prepare breakfast in bed! Or an awesome prank! Or a combination of the two!

Or maybe you are just looking for something more personal, an alarm-clock aimed to wake just you up in the time of need!
Have tried the vibrating alarm-clock? If so you know it's silent only in the same sense a bullet-wound is a little itchy. Especially if it happens to be placed on a hard surface.
So what is the solution? Are humans doomed always to wake up to the same ungodly noise since the beginning of time-measurement?

No more!
Now there are alternatives! Something with subtlety, pragmatism and with almost no reported fatalities!
I give you the first ever TRULY SILENT ALARM CLOCK!

The design is pretty simple. First, you wrap the band around your arm, something you won't even notice is there! To the inside of this band is a small copper wire attached to the cotton, connected through a cord to the alarm-clock! When it's time to wake up, the clock will send a high-volt, small-ampere shock to the wire that is guaranteed to wake you up with only an inaudible snap!
Genius!

Nobody will be bothered except you! Try this once in a life-time chance now!

I expect this product will be mass-produced within the next quarter.
Stay tuned until then!


P.S:
Today is the birthday of Mohandes Gandhi, who would have been 145 years old today if he hadn't been assassinated!
Happy Birthday!